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Sunday, November 17, 2002
I know that Im not going to want to post this if I read it over, but I think I'll want to have it later. I just got a phone call. It was my brother. I picked it up, not expecting to hear anything out of the ordinary. Then he told me- "Papa is in the hospital. He had an aneurysm. They don't know whether he is going to make it" It doesn't sink in right away. As my first real experience with someone close to me in this situation, I didn't know what to say or do. Im halfway across the country. We talked for a minute- he was going to the hospital- and I could hear the tears starting to come for him. He'd heard 45 minutes before, and called once before when I was in the shower. I could feel him transitioning out of the shock phase which I was definitely still in, and tears seemed to be coming from him as we hung up. I did the only rational thing I could then. I called Meg's place, but she wasn't there. And Amy, the next person I thought of was running out the door, and I didn't tell her. So noone here knows yet but me. After calling, I passed the next 10 minutes by prinitng out papers I needed to read for Cell Bio tomorrow. Thats when it really hit me. Starting with a few sniffles, I ended up sobbing and then crying. As a friend once said, I was surprised at how few tears there were at first, but then they kept coming. I know more will come if this doesn't turn out for the best, but for now at least I remain hopeful. Nana and Papa, all my love! 
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